Ghar science se nahi ... home science se chalta hai

A house doesn't run on science ... it runs on home science

Pyar mein chemistry hoti hai aur sex mein physics

In love there is chemistry and in sex there is physics

Jab sulphate, oxygen, nitrogen aur hydrogen in chaaron ko ek cylinder mein bhar do na ... toh choola nahi ghar jalta hai ... blast hota hai blast

When you add sulphate, oxygen, nitrogen and hydrogen all four together in a cylinder ... then a stove doesn't burn, but the whole house burns down ... it's a total blast

Har computer ki wahich kahani ... kahin porn star toh kahin sapnon ki rani

Every computer has the same story ... somewhere there is a porn star and somewhere there is a queen of dreams

Computer pe ungli marte marte tu mere se ungli kiya?

By typing on the computer with your fingers, you fingered with me?

Aaj ki duniya mein machine ne tarakki nahi ki hai, aadmi ne tarakki ki hai ... aaj tak aadmi machine banate aaye hai ... machine ne kabhi kisi aadmi ko nahi banaya hai

In today's age machines have not advanced, humans have advanced ... till today humans have made machines ... a machine has never made a human

Joh bhi kahoonga, sach main kahoonga ... tu paas ho ya door, par touch mein rahoonga ... email bhi karoonga, fax bhi karoonga ... tujhe SMS bhejke relax main karoonga

Whatever I say, I will say the truth ... whether you are close or far, I will stay in touch ... I will email you, I will fax you ... and I will send you a SMS and make you feel relaxed

Hum Kabir ka iphone, uska ipod, uski item ... sab cheen lenge ... i-shapath

We will steal Kabir's iphone, ipod, girlfriend ... everything ... I swear on my mother

Jism ke x-ray ka toh suna tha ... lekin aap toh character ka bhi kar lete hai

I had heard about the x-ray of a body ... but you can do that even for a character

Zindagi mein bhi VCR ki tarah rewind button hota ... toh kitna achcha hota

If life had a rewind button just like the VCR ... then it would have been great

Main koi universal charger hoon ... kahin bhi ghused doge

Am I an universal charger ... which can be inserted anywhere

Science is easy ... love is hard

Science is easy ... love is hard

Hum log science mein maante hai ... non-science mein nahi

We believe in science ... and not in non-science

Aap agar Shanaya hai toh main mooli hoon ... aap agar patang hai toh main aapka solar cell hoon ... aap agar saand hai toh main aapki ghanti ki bell hoon

If you're Shanaya then I'm radish ... if you're a kite then I'm your solar cell ... if you're a bull then I'm your bell

Yeh joh auratein hoti hai na, yeh internet ke virus ki tarah hoti hai ... pehle to mard ki life mein enter hoti hai ... phir uske dil aur dimaag ko scan karke ... uski sari khushiyan, uski sari azaadi, uske sare bank balance apne account mein transfer kar leti hai ... aur badle mein mard ke account mein kya download karti hai ... (kya?) ... tension, tadap, ghutan, bechaini, jhik-jhik, bachche ... aur uske chehre ki smile ko delete karke usse hamesha hamesha ke liye hang karke chali jaati hai

Women are like the virus from the internet ... first they enter a man's life ... then after scanning his heart and mind ... the transfer all his happiness, all his freedom, all his bank balance into their account ... and instead of that do you know what do they download in the man's account ... (what?) ... tension, yearning, suffocation, restlessness, fussiness, kids ... and then they leave deleting the smile from his face and hanging him forever

Ek baar mard hang ho gaya toh phir woh female kya ... e-mail ke layak bhi nahi reh jaata

Once a man hangs up then forget a female ... he is not even fit for an e-mail

Politics mein sahi galat ka koi barometer nahi hota ... joh sahi hai woh sahi hai ... aur joh galat hai woh bhi sahi hai

In politics there is no barometer for right or wrong ... what is right is right ... and what is wrong is also right

Tera control panel teri biwi ke haath mein hai na ... mera abhi bhi mere hi haath mein hai

Your control panel is in the hands of your wife ... mine is still in my hands

Aaj kal kehte hai ki bhagwan ke baad agar kisi ko sab kuch pata hai ... sab kuch ... toh woh hai Google

Nowadays it is said that if there's someone who knows everything after god ... literally everything ... then that's Google

Aadmi ke vikaas ke charan teen ... bandar, aadmi aur machine

There are three steps of human development ... monkey, human and machine