Hasso mat ... aaj se tumhare rone ke din shuru ho gaye hai

Zameen pe rhengne waala keeda kitna bhi bada kyun na ho ... usse masalne ke liye pair ka ek angootha hi kaafi hai

Gaadi mein bithao driver ban jaonga ... peeche bithao cleaner ban jaonga ... gaadi bighade toh usse dhakka lagaonga ... aur tumhe koi chhede toh uska khoon pee jaonga

Main bhi kitna harami hoon, dono taraf dhol bajhata hoon ... udhar se maal kamata hoon, idhar se naam kamata hoon

Yahan ki fikar wahan ka khayal rakha hai ... badi ada se dono jahan sambhal rakha hai

Main us haramzade ko aaisi bhayanak maut doonga ... ki kaali duniya ka har mujrim gaddari ke naam se kaanp uthega

Tum meri zindagi mein full stop toh kya comma bhi nahi laga sake ... lekin main tumhari zindagi mein full stop zaroor lagaonga

Without ticket passenger hamesha dara dara sa lagta hai ... saawan ke andhe ko charon taraf hara hara sa lagta hai

Mere kanne chakku hai!

Jaise bajhti hai ghanti ... vaise hai meri pyari pyari aunty

Langoor ki dumm par angoor ki bail ... mohabbat mein ab tu saare sitam jhel

Jis tarah aag lakdi ko jalakar raakh kar deti hai ... ussi tarah gussa insaan ki akal ko nighal jaata hai

Pehle khoon ke baad aadmi kanoon se darta hai ... lekin do-char khoon karne ke baad kanoon aadmi se darta hai

Aaisa mat kar havaldaar ... mujhko andhar mat kar mere yaar ... mera bhai hai bada shakti shali ... baja dega woh teri taali ... uske baad tera ho jayega mota pet khali

Jaldi se isse chhod ... varna aa jayega kahani mein ek naya modh ... ho jayegi shamshan ki taraf teri daud ... hai koi iska tera paas todh?

Ghamand toh ek sheesha hai joh toot kar hi rehta hai

Jab jab paapiyon ka bhav badta hai ... tab tab paapiyon ka papad banane koi na koi aa hi jaata hai

Mera naam hai Inspector Natwarlal Bhinde ... khata hoon che-che ande ... aur choron ko maarta hoon lambe chaude dande

Langoor ki dumm par angoor ki bail ... patni ko dekh ke engine ho gaya mera fail

Langoor ki dumm par angoor ki bail ... khatam ho gaya is moti ka khel