Barood ke canister pe behet ke Diwali nahi manayi jaati hai ... barood ke canister se manayi jaati hai

You don't celebrate Diwali by sitting on the canister of gunpowder ... you celebrate by using the canister of gunpowder

Aaj nag panchami hai kya? ... phir yeh saanp ko doodh kyun pila rahe ho?

Is today the festival of snakes? ... then why are you feeding milk to this snake?

Is Navratri mein aisa jaadu hai ... kisiko jaadu jaisa feel nahi hota

There's such a magic in the festival of Navratri that ... no one feels like it's even magic

Kal hum Holi khelenge ... lekin is Holi mein gulaal ki bajai dhuna udhega ... pichkariyon mein se rang nahi, bandookon mein se goliyan niklengi ... geeton ki jagah cheekein ... aur laaj ki jagah laashein tadapengi

Tomorrow I'll play Holi ... but in this Holi instead of colour powder, smoke will fly ... bullets will come out from guns instead of colour from water toys ... screams instead of songs ... and bodies will drop instead of modesty

Delhi ki ladkiyan aaisi dress karti hai ... jaise har roz Diwali ho

Girls from Delhi dress up as if ... it is Diwali everyday

Tumhari umar mere tajurbe se bahut kam hai ... tumne utni Diwaliyan nahi dekhi hai jitni maine tum jaise bikne waalon ki barbaadiyan dekhi hai

Your age is much less than my experience ... you haven't seen as many Diwali's, as many as I have seen the destruction of people like you who take bribes

Yeh Kamasutra ka desh hai ... joh hum mein apne shareer ka, apni aatma ka, apni kamana ka, apni manavata ka utsav manana sikhata hai

This is the country of Kamasutra ... which teaches us to celebrate the festival of our body, our soul, our wish, our humanity

Vishwas aapka saath hai toh yudh lage tyohaar

If you have faith on your side then even a war feels like a festival

Diwali mein chaar motichoor ke laddu nahi milne wale hai ... tu yahan bonus ke khwaab dekh rahi hai

For Diwali we won't get four bites of sweets ... and here you're dreaming about bonus

Har Ram ka apna Ravan ... har Ram ka apna Dussehra

Every Lord Rama has his own Ravana ... every Lord Rama has his own festival of Dussehra

Jab zindagi se khushi mitt jaye na ... toh Diwali sirf ek aag banke reh jaati hai

When happiness erases away from life ... then Diwali simply remains like a fire

Hum mein kya joh turbat ke melay rahenge ... tah-e-khaak hum toh akele rahenge

I don't care if there are festivals in the world ... I'll reside alone beneath the loads of dust

Duniya ka sabse bada festival pata hai kaunsa hai ... gharwali ... kyun ki usse baar baar manana padta hai

Do know what's the biggest festival in the world ... a wife ... because you have to pacify her all the time

Tum humein kya haraoge ... arre tumhare Pakistan mein itne log nahi, jitne hamare yahan Eid par bakre kaate jaate hai

You cannot defeat us ... in your Pakistan, there aren't even as many people as the number of goats slaughtered here during Eid