Kashmir na koi le sakta hai aur Kashmir na koi de sakta hai ... Kashmir mein bus teen din aur do raat ka honeymoon package ho sakta hai

When you can't change the girl ... change the girl

Pyar agar pant hai toh dosti chaddi hai ... pant agar phat bhi jaye toh chaddi izzat bachati hai

Agar tum safed saree mein laal bindi lagakar aa jao ... toh maa kasam ambulance lagogi

Woh mili mujhse Heer ki tarah ... taste mein thi woh kheer ki tarah ... aur dil ke paar hui woh teer ki tarah

Wife ne poocha husband se, ke sach kaho kitno ke saath soye ho? ... husband bola, soya toh bus tumhare saath, baki sehkadon ke saath jaga poori raat

Aurat bhi kya cheez hai ... kuch kaho toh mooh phula leti hai ... aur kuch karo toh pet phula leti hai

Buddies you are my chaddies

Maine bhari mehfil mein sher maara ... toh sherni vidhva ho gayi

Pachaas pachaas kos door jab raat ko gaon mein baap jagta hai ... toh beta bolta hai ki - "dad soo ja varna mere jaisa ek aur aa jayega"

Ibtada-e-ishq hai, rota hai kya ... toilet paper hai, dhota hai kya?

Na suhaag hai na raat hai, phir bhi suhaagraat ka scene nazar aata hai ... believe it or not, har kutte ka din aata hai

Chahe marr hum jaye phir bhi marham lagake jayenge ... dost ke dil se utar ke nahi, dost ke dil mein utar ke jayenge

Madhuri ki muskaan, Juhi ka jadoo, Sridevi ki shararat ... aur dhaki hui Mallika Sherawat

Life mein teen cheezo ko kabhi underestimate nahi karna chahiye ... love, sex aur dokha

When I am good I am good ... when I am bad I am even better

Hum toh ghante hai lekin woh khatre ki ghanti hai ... saali China ka maal hai nah guarantee hai na warranty hai

Is vidya ke mandir mein ... yahan vidya ki murat hai toh wahan vidya ka bhashan hai ... magar afsoos is baat ka hai ki hamare paas "Dirty Picture" ki Vidya Balan nahi hai

Bomb woh thi blast main ho gaya ... bina ruke kisi station par yeh slow train bhi fast ho gaya

Early to bed and early to rise ... makes your girlfriend go with other guys

Kiss ki nahi hoti koi classes ... it's just a hit with the masses

Yeh Seema woh hai jiski koi seema nahi ... aur yeh Seema woh hai jiske character ka koi bima nahi

Yeh shakal se H20 hai aur akal se H2SO4 hai

Ek minute ki value kisi ek olympic runner se pooch ... ek minute ki value toaster mein jalte hue slice se pooch ... unatees minute ke baad delivery karne waale pizza boy se pooch

Yeh chaand bhi kya ghazab dhahta hai ... bachpan mein mama aur jawani mein apne hi bachche ki amma nazar aata hai

Tu hi Seema ka sacha He-man hai ... tune chaddi bahar nahi pehni toh kya hua ... tu hi uska Superman hai

Har ladka soft drink ki botal ki tarah hota hai ... dimag ki jagah upar dhakan hota hai

Dono ka blood group bhi ek hi hai ... isliye nahi ki dono judwaa hai ... isliye ki dono ek doosre ka khoon chooste rehte hai

Aaj se main tera kambal tu meri razai ... main tera Honda tu meri Hyundai ... main tera langot tu meri neck tie ... main tujhe salaam karta hoon bhai

You're the one jispe atka hai mann

Ek dost ne ek dost ko yun peeta ... tann ki shakti, mann ki shakti senorita

Ki gal hai? ... life mein koi girl hai?

Physically maro line toh tabhiyat ekdum fine

Apne dil ke detergent se saare gile shikve saaf kar dijiye

What Raniji can't ... I can!