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Original Lyrics
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English Translation
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| Mujhe yaad hai woh baatein mere bachpan ki |
I still remember my childhood days |
| Daddy kehte the khota sikka chalega nahi |
My dad used to say I was useless like a fake coin |
| Mummy pyar se khilati daal, chaawal aur dahi |
My mom fed me rice, lentils and curd with love |
| Maa ke haathon ka woh jaadu five star mein nahi |
The magic of mom's food can't be found in a 5-star hotel |
| Mar marke mili college degree |
I barely got a college degree |
| Meri job ek tragedy, hai joke salary |
My job is a tragedy, my salary is a joke |
| Ek ladki mili thi woh bhi dump kar gayi |
I had found a girl but she also dumped me |
| Dump hone ko baitha hoon koi mile toh sahi |
I'm just sitting here ready to get dumped again |
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| O ho banda seedha rab da main |
I'm a straightforward man of God |
| Ditto tere warga main |
I'm just like you are |
| Kaam ghalat koi karda te |
If someone does something evil |
| Phir na usko chhadta main |
Then I don't spare them |
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| Kisi ladki ko chhede koi |
If you'll tease a girl |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Kare cheating aur khele koi |
If you cheat and play |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Mere India ko bura kaha |
If you call my India as bad |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Jana Gana pe na khada hua |
If you don't stand for the national anthem |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Toh dishoom, toh dishoom, toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
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| Bathroom mein Kishore-da ke gaane gaata hoon |
I sing Kishore Kumar songs in the bathroom |
| Katy Perry ki mein photo sang leke nahata hoon |
I shower with a photo of Katy Perry |
| Mere aaju baaju bikini mein babes nachdi |
Babes in bikini dance near me |
| But life koi Honey Singh ka video nahi |
But life is not a Honey Singh's video |
| Din ko main chahe jitna bhi hero hota hoon |
No matter how big a hero I am during the day |
| Raat ko takiye ki jhappi leke sota hoon |
In the night I sleep hugging a pillow |
| Kabhi kabhi kisi party mein zyada ho gayi |
If I get high in a party |
| Toh yaad karke purani baatein khoob rota hoon |
Then I remember the old days and cry a lot |
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| O ho banda seedha rab da main |
I'm a straightforward man of God |
| Ditto tere warga main |
I'm just like you are |
| Ek waari hath phad laan taan |
If I catch hold of a hand once |
| Phir kadi nahi chhadta main |
Then I never let it go |
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| Ram Rahim ladaye koi |
If you make people fight for religion |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Chote bachon ko daraye koi |
If you scare small children |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Nasha karke joh aaye koi |
If you take drugs |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Mere bhai ko sataye koi |
If you trouble my brother |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Toh dishoom, toh dishoom, toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
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| Kabhi na karoon main kaam koi aisa |
I'll never do something |
| Ke jis se jhuke meri gardan |
Which will make my head bow down |
| Jeeta hoon, jeeta hoon, papa se seekha hoon |
I've learnt from my dad to live life |
| Mujhpe kuch hai burden, jaise hardam |
There is like always a burden on me |
| Ghar chalana hai jaise ya taise |
We have to run the house no matter what |
| Chote sapno ke liye jodhon paise kaise kaise |
I collected money for my small dreams |
| Arre kaise kaise kaam kare taaki naam bane |
I did all kinds of work to become famous |
| Duniya dekh ke mujhko bhaijaan ram ram kare |
The world respects me when they see me |
| Par dhyan rahe mujhko kabhi na chhedna |
But remember, don't you ever tease me |
| Dene mein ik dishoom mujhko lagegi der na |
I won't hesitate to smash a punch |
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| O ho banda seedha rab da main |
I'm a straightforward man of God |
| Ditto tere warga main |
I'm just like you are |
| Kaam ghalat koi karda te |
If someone does something evil |
| Phir na usko chhadta main |
Then I don't spare them |
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| Khud apni badhai kari |
If you praise yourself |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Ratta maar ke padhai kari |
If you simply mug up and learn |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Rishwat leke kaam kiya |
If you take a bribe |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Raste pe traffic jam kiya |
If you cause a traffic jam on the road |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Public bhadkaye koi |
If you provoke people |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Meri bandi ko pataaye koi |
If you hit on my girlfriend |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Chalu picture mein phone baja |
If your phone rings in a movie |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Gaana sunke na aaya mazaa |
If you listen to the song and don't like it |
| Toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
| Toh dishoom, toh dishoom, toh dishoom |
Then I'll punch you |
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