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Kartik Tiwari

# 1

Woh aaj humse mile anjaano ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah ... har nigaah mein aur door chale jaate hai ... humse nazar churate hai baimaanon ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah

She met me today like a stranger ... I was waiting for her like crazy ... in every sight she kept going farther away ... she was avoiding me with dishonesty ... I was waiting for her like crazy
# 2

Woh kehte hain kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi ... dil bhi toh nadan unke sivah kahin aur khota nahi ... hum mangte hai ek saans, ek dhadkan, ek nigaah ... woh kabhi aur de jaate hai ... par yeh kambakht kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi

She says sometime else, but that sometime never comes ... even my silly heart doesn't go anywhere else other than her ... I ask for one breathe, one heartbeat, one sight ... but this crazy sometime else never comes
# 3

In ladkiyon ko na koi khush nahi rakh sakta ... a happy woman is a myth!

No one can keep a girl happy ... a happy woman is a myth!
# 4

Any discussion with a woman is an argument!

Any discussion with a woman is an argument!
# 5

Shaadi ke pehle woh nagin been kyun bajhta hai ... kyun ki na band waala bhi tumhe chetavani de raha hota hai kaun aa raha hai tumhari zindagi mein ... inka signature tune hai woh

Why do they play the snake's tune before you get married ... because even the person playing the band is warning you, as to who is coming in your life ... it's their signature tune
# 6

Tum kya leke aaye the, kya leke jaoge ... nange chale aaye the, nange hi chale jaoge

What did you get and what will you take with you ... you had come naked and you'll go naked
# 7

Teri zulfon se chanti aati bulb ki roshni ko dekh aaisa laga ... jaise kisi jharoke se chaand jhaank raha ho

Looking at the filtered light of the bulb coming from your hair it feels as if ... the moon is peeping from some window
# 8

Raat kitni hi bhayanak kyun na ho ... subah zaroor hoti hai

No matter how dangerous the night is ... the morning definitely comes
# 9

Har ladki ki life mein ek umar aati hai jab usse realise hota hai ki ab uski life ... ek driver, ek bodyguard, ek naukar aur ek ATM ke bina nahi chal sakti ... aur ab ladki itna sab kuch toh afford kar sakti nahi na ... toh ladkiyan dhoondti hai boyfriend

In every girl's life there comes a moment when she realises that now her life ... will not work without a driver, a bodyguard, a servant and an ATM machine ... and since every girl can't afford all of this ... that's why girls look for a boyfriend
# 10

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X
# 11

Shaadi mein sabse important cheez kya hoti hai ... maang bharna ... aur aadmiyon ka toh kaam hi hai aurat ki har maang bharna

What's the most important thing in a marriage ... to fill vermilion in a women's hair parting ... and it's the duty of men to fulfill every desire of women
# 12

Har ladki ka siyapa hai ki I love surprises ... jab ki asal baat yeh hai ki women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised

Every woman claims that they love surprises ... but the reality is that women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised
# 13

Ladke ne ladki ko do din hug nahi kiya toh problem ... hug kiya toh cheap ho rahe ho, itna bhi achcha nahi lagta

If a guy didn't hug the girl for two days then that's a problem ... and if he hugged then she says that you're being cheap, it doesn't look good
# 14

Tum meri maa ko manipulative bolo ... koi tension nahi ... maine tumhari maa ko zara sa touchy ka bol diya ... itni touch ho jaati hai ki, by god hafton tak touch karne ko na mile

She can call my mom manipulative ... there is no issue ... but if I call her mom just touchy ... then she gets so touched that, by god I don't get to touch her for weeks
# 15

Woh tumhare maa baap ke baare mein kuch bhi bol le ... koi tension nahi ... tum unke maa baap ke baare mein zara si ek line bol do ... toh 3rd aur 4th world war dono ek saath ho jayenge

She can say anything against your parents ... there is no issue ... but if you say even one line against her parents ... then the 3rd and 4th world war, both will start together
# 16

Shaadi shuda aadmi hamesha office ke liye late kyun ho rahe hote hai ... kyun ki joh time pe uthte hai woh baat karne mein late ho jaate hai ... aur joh samajhdar hai woh uthte hi late hai ... ki saala utho, tayaar ho aur bhaago

Why do married men are always running late for office ... because those who get up on time become late by talking ... and those who are smart get up late itself ... so that you get up, get ready and run
# 17

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but koi yeh nahi batata ki behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but no one tells you that behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman
# 18

Aaisa kabhi nahi hoga ki tum do lakh kama rahe ho ... aur woh maa baap ke pressure mein pachaas hazar waale se shaadi karle

This will never happen where you're making 200,000 ... and under pressure from her parents she marries someone who makes only 50,000
# 19

Ab pata chala yeh aadmiyon ko itne heart attack kyun aate hai aur yeh gay bandhe itne successful kyun hote hai ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness na

Now I came to know why so many men get heart attacks and why these gay people are so successful ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness
# 20

Bribe is an institution started by women ... kyun ki inke pass joh dene ko rishvat hai woh kabhi khatam nahi hone waali ... aur hum saale rishvatkhor apni maraaye jaa rahe hai ... isse toh acha hai saala apne haath se hi shaadi karlo

Bribe is an institution started by women ... because what they have to offer as a bribe is never ending ... and we dumb people who accept their bribe are getting screwed ... better than that would be to marry our hands
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Song Lyrics - Kartik Tiwari
Ban Gaya Kutta - Pyaar Ka Punchnama
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